Couples
There’s something about couples as they get older. You can just look at them and tell things. Like they don’t always have to be impressing each other. Like they have a long history together. Like its ok if they have periods of silence. And they are so comfortable together. They almost know what the other one is about to say or is thinking.There’s one of those couples in the restaurant I’m at right now. She’s dressed a little funky in a jean jacket and jewelry, short gray hair, and wearing glasses. Maybe kind of a hippie look. He’s not so funky. Tank top, jeans (in Florida?), kind of looks disinterested. I like her more than I like him. She seems enlightened and he seems distracted. She’s the spark. She’s Coleen but he’s not me. I am attentive and anxious to hear what she has to say. He doesn’t seem to offer any observations or attempt to stimulate conversation. I do. I always wanted to make her laugh. I would always say something to get her to react, hopefully happily.
I’m jealous of couples. Especially couples that are close to my age. To our age. We were such a great couple. I mean, just great. We were the standard bearers on how couples should be. People wanted to be in our company, we were Coleen and Rob. We were fun and inspiring. We had parties, game nights, happy hours. We made people comfortable and made them laugh.
Now it’s just me and I can’t be that couple and I am jealous. I am mad about no longer being part of a couple, especially a couple that included Coleen. I was privileged to have my role in that. I can not replicate that and I miss it.
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